Well we did it. After praying and crying and questioning and hesitating and second-guessing ourselves to death --- we enrolled our daughter into public school today. That may seem like a trivial decision --- but only to those who do not live inside our walls. She will start third grade not knowing a soul, being completely unfamiliar with the concept of American education, and learning in a language that is not her primary tongue. These factors do not include the orphanage effects of almost a decade that play on her ability to communicate, build relationships, embrace reality, and succeed academically. We have no idea if this will be a successful venture for her. We simply trust that God has aided us in every step of the way to prepare her. We trust that He has led us to make the best decision for our family at this time, as well as for her, specifically. We rely on His faithfulness to do what He says he will do.
As far as I can tell, there are no specific passages of Scripture that address the questions of my today: should we continue to keep her out to home school her, place her in the private school, or utilize the public school district in which we know NO ONE? I share it because when I have called out to God on my knees about this situation that seems to have no straight Biblical mandates or suggestions, I read these verses:
Isaiah 30:19-21 O people of Zion, who live in Jerusalem, you will weep no more. How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. Although the LORD gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them.Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way, walk in it."
I truly believe we have been experiencing this "voice behind us" this week in every tiny step along the way. We don't know how it will turn out. Maybe it will be a disaster. Maybe we will loose another year of progress lost before she came to us in the first place. Maybe she will have some personal victories and some of her deficiencies from her earlier life will be met by people more qualified than we are? I don't know. But right now, tonight...I will choose to rest in His faithfulness to me through His word. If He says I will hear Him ---- then what I hear I better act upon. If he says I will sense that internal voice nudging me in a particular direction --- then I need not hesitate. Even when the Word is not specific to my question --- He remains faithful to answer my need. Isn't He precious.
Written on Tuesday, 17 August 2010 23:50 by Cheri Strange
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